Category: History

Feeling Through is Not the Representation I Want to See

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By Mary Wilson

The Oscars for 2021 are pending and there is a huge slate of movies that have been nominated, with a record-breaking number of films centered on or staring people with disabilities.

Guess how many it took to break that record?

Three.

There are three films that are about the experiences of disabled people. One, Sound of Metal, is a feature film about a drummer who is losing his hearing and does not have any hearing-impaired or D/deaf actors in leading roles (there are minor roles and extras who are hearing-impaired). Crip Camp is a documentary that extensively features disabled people about a summer camp for disabled people that helped lead to the disability rights movement in the US. Feeling Through is a short film that features a deafblind supporting actor about an abled young man helping a deafblind man get home.

I don’t want to shit all over the strides made with actually seeing representation of real disabled people in film that are made with these three films. It’s an achievement that needs to be commented on but I will stop short of celebrating something that should have happened a very long time ago.

I have seen, loved and shared Crip Camp with everyone I thought would enjoy it. It addressed so very many things in a very human way. It was everything I could have hoped for in a documentary about people.

I have not seen Sound of Metal but I want to. I will probably engage in serious suspension of disbelief to get past the “Riz Ahmed isn’t HoH or Deaf” thing and I will probably have THOUGHTS and FEELINGS about it but… I’m a punk and metal fan so I’m willing to deal with those when they come.

That leaves the third film, Feeling Through. I made the decision to watch it after reading criticism of it from deafblind attorney and activist Haben Girma. I wanted to know if I should be annoyed at it or if I should be mad at it. I try really hard not to hate films without seeing them (except films by very specific directors-that-shall-not-be-named. Those I outright refuse to watch, no matter their artistic or cultural merits) even when I’m fairly certain there will be things I find, at best, to be misrepresentations and, at worst, to be absolute bullshit. Feeling Through is beautifully shot and the actors are very good. There’s a decent amount of chemistry between Tareek (Steven Prescod), an abled but housing-insecure young man and Artie (Robert Tarango), a deafblind middle-aged man.

That’s the end of my positive takeaways. Turns out, I should be mad at Feeling Through and you probably should be mad too. Lisa Ferris has an amazing analysis of the wide variety of problems with this movie from the perspective of someone who is herself deafblind. I encourage you to read her article on it. I am mostly just going to be echoing her sentiments with my own interpretation.

First and foremost, I strongly believe that Feeling Through is inspiration porn. If you are unfamiliar with the term, “inspiration porn” was coined by writer and activist Stella Young (https://www.ted.com/talks/stella_young_i_m_not_your_inspiration_thank_you_very_much/transcript?language=en). It’s a way to describe images and stories of marginalized people, almost always disabled people, doing normal daily activities, participating in “regular” life. These images and stories are implicitly used to “inspire” abled people because if a disabled person can do something, why shouldn’t or can’t you? I could go into why this is problematic but I will leave that for a later time. If you don’t see why such images are problematic, please, just trust me for now.

Artie himself is almost a caricature of inspiration porn but the way he is written lacks the awareness of the potential problematic nature of this characterization. He is just going about his daily life, trying to get home from a date (yay for giving some hints at sexuality in disabled people I guess). I call this a caricature because even for inspiration porn, Artie’s “struggle” to participate in the world is unbelievably naïve and lacking any fundamental understanding of how self-reliant and independent disabled people are/have to be.

Artie is portrayed as relying completely upon the support of strangers to help him navigate his attempt to get home from his date. The only tools he seems to have available to help himself are a series of pre-printed questions or requests and a notebook where he can write more specific information or questions. Although that may have been the norm for deafblind people 20 years ago, the proliferation of and inexpensive access to cell phones and digital braille display devices are an inescapable demonstration of the deliberate efforts of the filmmaker to keep Artie as “helpless” as possible to help the plot.

Because Artie is demonstrated to be virtually helpless without the intervention of strangers, his presence in the film makes it feel like he is a prop, not a person. He is objectified as someone who is there to help and, in being helped, he facilitates Tareek’s growth and change. He is not even the source of the inspirarion part of the story. Tareek is given that role and Artie is the object that allows Tareek to inspire us.

My final problem is that the main character is a housing-insecure young black man. I personally want more diversity of all types in film however, in this particular case casting a black actor is the opposite of what that means to me.

Spoilers ahead.

One of the first things Tareek does when Artie requests his assistance buying a drink in a bodega is rob Artie. He uses Artie’s money to buy himself a chocolate bar and pockets $10 of the change. Yes, Artie just thoughtlessly handed over his wallet to Tareek so he could pay for Artie’s drink, showing a disturbing level of naiveté but that’s problematic for other reasons. Tareek robs Artie. That’s what happens. A young, housing-insecure black man robs a disabled dude. The role could just have easily been played by any other young actor but the director chose a black actor. He chose to have a young black man rob someone. For the record, the writer/director appears to be an abled white guy. This is the first time in my life I’ve asked out loud why this role had to be played by a black actor because I could see no other reason for it than the writer/director having unexamined racist stereotypes playing in his head while casting.

Artie, because of the manufactured naivete in this narrative, does not notice the missing money. He is so oblivious and helpless that he apparently can’t even keep track of his own cash and the theft does not impact his reliance on and trust in Tareek for the rest of the evening.

But don’t worry. After helping Artie all night, Tareek realizes that he is not entitled to Artie’s money but instead of admitting to Artie that he stole from him, Tareek leaves the $10 in a homeless man’s empty coffee cup.

Spoilers over.

So, to sum up my feelings about Feeling Through in a more concise way; This is a piece of inspiration porn that objectifies and infantilizes a grown deafblind man for the purpose of villainizing and then granting absolution to a housing-insecure young black man. There is not one bit of this story that I find unproblematic. This is not the representation I want to see of anyone in film, especially not groups who have been consistently ignored or vilified by mainstream filmmaking.

Disability Pride History

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A brief celebration of disability pride in the recent history of the disability rights movement.

Thank you to Renee Lopez and Ann Ross for contributing these images

International Day of People with Disabilities

Hi everyone! Mary here. Today we recognize the International Day of People with Disabilities. To celebrate, we attended a flag-raising, award ceremony and reception Dec. 2nd, 2019 at HRM City Hall. We had many interesting conversations, including an important take on the history of Disability Rights and Inclusion from Gerianne. She reminded us that is wasn’t that long ago, only 1980, that restaurants had the right to kick her out for no reason other than existing with a disability and wanting to eat.

Gerianne’s lesson in history is valuable reminder as to how far we’ve come and how far we have left to go to ensure the full inclusion of people with disabilities in every aspect of life. It was a stark reminder to hear Gerianne’s experiences after we were let in the side door, because the front door of City Hall is not accessible. Yesterday, a group of people walked into City Hall to be recognized, a group that would not have received the same treatment 30 years ago. We have much left to do but today, we will celebrate inclusion, diversity and uniqueness.

Good “Full Inclusion” Discussion With Our NS Barristers Association!

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Thank you to ReachAbility NS and the NS Barristers’ Society for hosting the Disability and Inclusion Awareness Workshop yesterday!

There were so many amazing conversations and ideas! We look forward to seeing what comes next

 

(photo & news by: Mary M. Wilson)

Gerianne Is Back!

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On September 24, I put a decision I’ve made into action and I was completely overwhelmed by the response it received.

That evening I posted the following on my Facebook page:
“For several reasons, I’m reclaiming “Gerianne.” (Annie is fine too, but it’s time for Gerianne to reclaim her rightful place in my life again.)”

The immediate affirming reaction from people connected as friends on my Facebook page was mind-blowing. I never for a second thought my decision to revert back to my legal name of “Gerianne” would receive such a reaction. Actually, I really wasn’t expecting much of a reaction at all, but within about 5 seconds after announcing it, the post had 6 likes. Another minute or so later, the likes were up to 9, and then kept climbing….. 15 likes….. 29 likes!

When I expressed my shock to a long-time close friend, she said this:

“Well, a lot of people have known you through all that you have gone through in the past number of years and they are glad to see you rising up again – to assert your own individuality again.”

In reflection, I felt that “Gerianne” really needed to go to “a quiet place” for a time. She was battled, emotionally bruised, worn out, and exhausted, in every way possible. Her sensed of self-esteem and self-worth had been obliterated into unrecognizable specs of dust, caused by being verbally, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually abused, for countless hours, which turned into countless days, which turned into countless months, which added up to about two years, by the man who once promised to love and cherish her forever.

Gerianne laughs now when people assume it was he who left her. But back then, she definitely wasn’t laughing. She was struggling to survive, day by day. Early on she learned the hard way that reaching out to friends and family only made things worse – for them and for herself.

She remembers one night when she was talking to her brother on the phone. She thought she had privacy, behind a closed door. The “ex” told her he’d be watching TV and wouldn’t hear a thing. Her brother wanted to know how she was holding up, so she told him. When she got off the phone, she quickly learned that the “ex” had been listening the whole time. He then proceeded to give her a verbal 3 hour verbal shit-kicking. It was then she realized that she couldn’t call her brother, her sister, close friends, or anyone. So she pretty much cut herself off from most of those she loved dearly, hoping that if told them the least, they wouldn’t worry. There were only two people she confided in during that time, her then only attendant and her Minister/friend. Those two people became Gerianne’s lifelines and kept her from going insane, or losing all hope altogether. But whenever anyone asked how she was doing, she would give them the party line of: “Oh, I’m fine. I’m doing okay. Yup. I’m good.” But most didn’t have a clue of what she was going through, not even her brother. It wasn’t til he came to visit after she moved to her own place (2 and a half years later) did she tell him just how horrific things had gotten for her

After her divorce, “Annie” came into being, and Annie was there when Gerianne just couldn’t be. Annie was more open, (perhaps even just a tiny bit naughty) and more willing to step out of Gerianne’s reserved lifestyle. Annie dared to try new things, was much more liberated; and in time, Annie taught Gerianne how to honestly be “Gerianne” with no pretense, no trying to be who and what others expected or wanted her to be; and maybe most importantly, Annie taught Gerianne to be at peace with exactly who she is, with all her good and all her bad, and just be the whole genuine Gerianne.

On the post, another friend quoted Shakespeare’s infamous line: “A rose is still a rose by any other name…..” but with the utmost respect to Shakespeare and others, I disagree.

As I wrote in a poem which I started many years ago (and honestly, just finished it that evening) I say:

“A rose is not a rose by any other name
For in a name
There is identity and familiarity.
There is history and continuity.
There is a knowledge of the past
And dreams for the future.

A rose is not a rose by any other name
For in a name
There is the recognition of what once was
and what is to become.
There is a rite of respect and the essence of dignity.

A rose is not a rose by any other name
For by any other name
a rose can be mistaken as just any other flower.”

                                                                                            By: Gerianne B. Hull

Is Annie completely gone now? No, of course not. Never. But it’s time for Gerianne to retake her place and to continue the life she’s meant to live.